"In my next life, please let me have better luck."
I'm stressing, hurting, crying, and dying! I just don't know how to deal with this anymore. I love you, so much and you know I do. I don't know why but it just hit me.. you and I both know what we been through. You caused me so much pain and I know I have too. One day, we will just look back at us and just be like, we were a fairytale. I'm so hurt, all I feel like doing is cry. Every time I think of you it just makes me wanna cry my eyes out.. yes I'm a cry baby. Can you just don't go out for one weekend and stay with him? Is that so hard to do. I really want us to work but your just pushing me away every time I try. Please, I'm begging you.. on my knees let me try and love you like I use to. I'm just slowly letting go of you, because I don't want to deal with this bullshit of yours anymore. And right now you just want to have your fun and don't even care about me. Changing you is what I have to do first.. It's hard but I will succeed! 4 days without talking to you for a least 30 minutes is killing me. When will you ever settle down and know that you have a girlfriend across the states. :( I'm not just a girl who you get and leave.. I'm a girl who has feelings and know when to come home to talk to you. I wish I never loved you... but I truly, madly do! Let us work for love, Yeng. I love you and miss you lots!